I feel like I'm just tolerating them, just getting along because there's no other choice, like roommates that I can't get rid of. I don't feel any sense of "immortality" that other people have told me they feel, in that they will live on through their children. If not, the feelings of exhaustion, irritation, and apathy tend to overshadow the love that's really there. I am sure it meant the world for him too. She was coping with enormous challenges every day without a mother who believed in her. One of them is that your child will teach you how to be the parent they need — if you're willing to listen. We pick every product that we think you'll love the most. Has uneven skills (as a toddler, she knew the whole alphabet and could count to 60, but could barely string three words together). After all, he has accepted her as is all along. If this is the case, try to remember that it’s the behavior you Do you tell your kids you love them? Don't feel bad posting this - you've told us because, actually, you DO love your DS and you do want to change things for the better. He's the only person whom I've felt such strong hatred for (I know it's a strong word), but now that I'm older I can't help but feel sorry for him that he had to live with a child he never wanted. I would never have seen it that way. That day finally arrived and I never felt happier. First, know that you are not alone, and that these feelings are shared by others. I canceled the appointment. My first reaction was relief — a diagnosis! 2 thoughts on “ I Don’t Love My Child Anymore She Said – Or Does She? I’d say, “I love you, Sweetie,” and hear nothing in response. I know that can sound selfish, but if it's for your own mental health and your family's, it's not. As the diagnosis sank in, I found myself feeling more tender, more motherly toward Sophie. The psychologist recommended that I connect with Sophie over something she enjoys, and as much as Calico Critters weren't my thing, I vowed to try. A person can't force emotion on themselves. As Lilah grew healthy and robust, Sophie looked noticeably meek by comparison. I think it has to do with his childhood, which was not very good. Hi i'm 35. my husband totally devestated me my saying he didn't love me anymore . Even worse, I had resented her for letting me down, when it was I who was letting her down. I remember thinking "I've made a terrible mistake. I just do those things because I feel like I have to, though, not because I want to. It hurts when my child says she doesn’t love me. It's not like you can hide that something's wrong. Sadly, my efforts only made her feel more self-conscious and anxious. We were raised by strict, overprotective Indian parents. Yes, I do. Parental love enhances the well-being and development of children. I have sacrificed a lot in my life for them (not more than other people, but just various opportunities in life, or even things like missed social occasions), because that's what you do, and I resent them for it. I sometimes tell them I love them. Instead of gritting his teeth through her most eccentric behaviors, he imitates them in an exaggerated way, which makes her howl with laughter. I instantly regretted scads of horrible things I'd said to her over the years and prayed that the damage wasn't irreparable. But she does put work and thought into parenting, and that's been really important for my development. If they sinned then god will be there on judgment day for them to answer to, and you are here on earth giving your child the teaching as per your christian religion and god will see that so please dont tell your daughter you dont love her anymore because that could lead to her having complexities. And that's the difference between two years of therapy or twenty. But, there are times when it feels necessary to say, so a few times a month I say it. Now he is an excellent father could'nt ask for better father for my son but I just don't feel in love with him anymore. Life seemed hard for her. And I was a natural. I found a pediatric neurologist, but when they sent me forms to ll out, Sophie had none of the physical symptoms in the boxes under "Reason for Visit." Hopefully they have access to therapy because they'll almost certainly need it. It broke my heart a little every day. Prefers to play alone (when other kids try to play with her, she ignores them, or tries to play but doesn't seem to grasp how). I have a (female) friend with grown children who has been outspoken in saying that if she knew that not having children was an option, she would have chosen that, but marriage and children was the expectation. I just have no love for them, and I never have. Bingo! I wonder if OP is in the military. Your personal feelings toward their personalities and strain on your personal goals and aspirations is again partially your responsibility. I asked what she meant. A dark cloud shadowed my heart. She would try to hide it as best she could, as I suppose that's what she thought was right; but after 16 years, we both cut our losses and went our separate ways. jm. I have questions. We have been married 18 years. I've had similar feelings in the past, and after a lot of thought, for me it was because I wasn't practicing good self-care. Mostly they cause bad feelings, by being shouty, lazy, rude, etc. Sure. This content is created and maintained by a third party, and imported onto this page to help users provide their email addresses. ANYONE to turn to that they KNOW they're loved; so they know they're not alone. jm. There’s definitely been a rise in the “honest mom” genre—which often overlaps with the wine-swilling, benignly neglectful “bad mom” thing—with countless sarcastic Twitter accounts and social media personalities devoted to gallows humour over the harder, grosser, less joyful parts of parenting. I felt guilty that I was basically repelled by my own child. My husband accused me of searching for a diagnosis that didn't exist, but I needed to know why my daughter wasn't meeting her developmental milestones, let alone my expectations. I started to cry, because I knew she was right. I love my kids more than existence itself, and I can't thing of a single thing in this universe that can evoke such an overwhelming sense of every possible emotion, other than them. It's not of hate nor love, but sheer indifference and I'm fine with that. ” Tom and Dena Yohe. My father had a lot of difficulty to love, to let the love flourish, and to be able to let it show. She wouldn't make eye contact, and she'd scream bloody murder at the sound of ripping paper. And I suffer greatly because of that knowledge. I cant get my head round it....I would never dream of telling my kids I dont love them anymore. As a parent, it's hard to watch your child, this tiny creature you love more than yourself, struggle and remove herself from the group; harder still when you're a parent with a personality like Jenny's. Why Don’t I Love My Child? I don’t love him anymore. Whenever I would tuck that little one into bed and kiss those soft baby cheeks, my child would stare at the ceiling, ignoring my affection. Like I have two kids but I don't see them as them holding me back (eventhough it's just hard in general to work and go to school ) I love them and wouldn't go back and nit have them. Send them off somewhere fun, and just have some quiet time to yourself? The reason I gave you my story, is because as a father, Your kids well being are important to me. 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